Wednesday, December 5, 2012

What to do when you cannot operate Heavy Machinery

It is only because I was unable to spend the afternoon operating heavy machinery that I allowed myself the time to contemplate the tempestuous and sartorial life of Christina of Markyate.

When being informed about the ‘procedure’ scheduled for this morning, I had neglected to properly note the prohibition against operating heavy machinery. (Now what do I do about the wood chipper? The chain saw? The electric waffle-maker? How heavy is heavy?)
The nurse claimed that the anti-heavy machinery injunction was clearly started somewhere in the 144 pages of informational paperwork and liability waivers. Or maybe it was imbedded in the 25 minute video that the doctor’s office sent to my email and then ….then, they actually knew if I had actually watched it and they even knew if I had started it and then decided I’d had enough of animated pictures of curly colons being probed by paparazzi electric eels, in which case I received ‘gentle reminder’ emails to watch the whole damn video, and if I didn’t watch the whole thing they threatened to perform the colonoscopy without anesthesia, so I could feel and hear everything I missed.
Somewhere in there I was not focusing on the heavy machinery taboo.
And since I can’t be applying myself to heavy machinery, as would be my wont, I have spent some time with Christina of Markyate (1097 – 1160) who, even if she never had the fun of operating a wood splitter, was seriously ahead of her time in the matter of defying parental matchmaking, defying the bishop, and needlework. The mitres she embroidered with silken threads for Pope Adrian IV were the twelfth century’s high point in millinery. She also proved to be a formidable adversary to the toads (sent by the devil) who invaded her anchorite cell. But far more challenging than the toads were the visions of Roger, her favorite priest, naked. These visions were of course likewise sent by the devil to tempt her, and Christina resisted that temptation. Valiantly.
A wood chipper would have been a walk in the park for Saint Christina of Markyate.


Anonymous said...

Enthusiasm keeps us looking forward to the future This is where you must be completely dedicated to find another echo thought and corresponding behaviorsHowever realize that the Chinese Culture has historic writings in excess of 10[url=]Women's Stevan Ridley Jersey[/url]
000 years back[url=]Kids A.J. Green Jersey[/url]
which predates these cultures writings
GOD THE FATHER IS A GOD OF MAXIMUM INTENSITY There's also a Camo jersey that looks a lot like a basketball uniform[url=]Arian Foster Jersey[/url]
with side panel detail at the sleevesIsopropyl alcohol: Do not use regular rubbing alcohol

Anonymous said...

I will quote Alexander Marshack shortly[url=]J.J. Watt Jersey Blue[/url]
his great work on an ancient lunar calendar is just another item that fits my long held perception[url=]Julius Peppers Jersey[/url]
that we know so little and assume far too much stupidity for or about our forbears Then we will have peace One of the items is your personal style
It keeps you living in the moment Great way to model for your children Too often[url=]Green Aaron Rodgers Jersey[/url]
generic[url=]Nike Julio Jones Jersey[/url]
across-the-board training is administered