Slime: not all that easy

I assumed making slime would be easy.
Actually, I never gave it a thought.

Leda, delightful ten-year-old granddaughter from Brooklyn was staying with us, and Monday afternoon I discovered her at my computer studying YOU TUBE videos for DIY Slime. There are many many said videos. They all avow their recipe to be easy. And they all seem to be narrated and produced by children, in some cases very young children. Leda and I agreed that following recipes devised by children half her age was probably not a great idea.
Many of them assert that their recipe can create slime without borax. Borax is the sine qua non of slime, but it is also the peanut allergy of slime.
The slime on the YOU TUBE videos appears in many different colors, exquisite shades of green or blue or purple. Leda wanted to make purple slime. She informed me that purple is her favorite color, and even if it is girlie, she doesn’t care.
I said that purple couldn’t be that girlie if is the color worn by Catholic cardinals. And popes.

We watched the videos together, and then we tried various combinations of shaving cream, contact lens solution, glue sticks, Elmer’s glue, shower gel soap, laundry soap, dish soap, and salt. Squashing glue sticks with a fork is harder than you would think, and then the glue gets stuck in the tines. We varied the amounts and rations when the indicated amounts failed to produce slime. We stirred fast with a spoon, then a toothpick, then a chopstick, then a whisk. We put the soap and salt solution in the freezer for the allotted time.
watched many videos, and followed the instructions faithfully. But time and again, we did not produce slime.
Later, Leda pointed out, “Nana, they can photo-shop those videos.”
“That would be cheating,” I said.
Leda rolled her eyes.
“I was really looking forward to that slime,” I said. And it was true.