Wednesday, April 11, 2012

What about dental floss?

My brother (unnamed, you know who you are) just sent me the following article, from a news magazine, The Week, of 13 April 2012. It raises some thorny questions.
"Tampa officials have released a list of items considered a security threat during the Republican National Convention in August, including water pistols, masks and even pieces of string. Firearms are not on the list. State gun laws prohibit any local restriction on the carrying of guns. "If we'd tried to regulate guns, it wouldn't have worked," says a city official."

Does dental floss count as string? I don't know about you, but I don't like to go anywhere without dental floss. Dental floss is useful for many things, such as a tourniquet in cases of snake bit. It can be used to construct the rigging of a thee-masted schooner you are making with a hollowed out watermelon. If you write a book while waiting in line you can bind it with dental floss, just don't forget to paginate. If your hair is flying all over the place you can tie it up with dental floss. While dental floss is not strong enough to be used - in pinch - as a leash for Daisy or Bruno, it works very well for a carpenter bee or a stinkbug, if you happen to catch one and want to take it for a stroll.
And then there is the use for which dental floss is meant.Back when I smoked pot (and this may have precipitated the end of my pot-smoking days), immediately upon feeling the effects of marijuana I felt compelled to floss my teeth vigorously and at length. To floss them until they bled.
And what about masks?

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